A PUBLIC CERVIX
my people, comrades and bosom friends.
I wish to talk to you about a problem that I feel
affects us all.
other day I was enjoying a doughnut and a coke in
a cafe when I noticed something curious. I saw a
mother with two girls of fairly
young age (although their sex is
not relevant to my point), definitely younger
than 10, waiting in line to buy their meal. I
know this because I was standing next to them in
the queue, bravely ignoring their excited
yells and tiresome escapades. It was
with some gratitude that I paid for my food and
left them far behind, but as I watched, I saw the
girls, full as they were with
the idealism of youth, claimed
three whole tables for their purpose, one for
each member of the party. This is not what
astounded me, though. When the mother brought
their meal across to them, she went along with
their little game.
perhaps you need to appreciate how crowded the
cafe was to understand my bother, but this to my
mind was not acceptable behaviour, especially
when so many people would require a seat in the
near future. Had that been me when I was their
age I would've been chastised for
being so naughty, why was the
mother tolerating this?
regular readers will know exactly how much I
detest children, so obviously I cannot be swayed
by their mask of cuteness. I
hear a new story on the news every day about
youngsters killing and vandalising and being
generally nasty, and I believe I
now know why. We've gone soft on them. We're
trying to show the vicious little bastards
understanding, and it's just not working, guys!
Smacking children nowadays is illegal in this
country. What's insane is that a father who
smacked his child for being naughty
not too long ago was jailed, while thugs as young
as ten run amok in the streets!
world is being taken over by youths who
have never been taught right from wrong properly.
I feel very strongly about this subject as you
can no doubt tell. My belief that we should stop
being so bloody understanding goes right down to
the bottom of the heart that
beats within my breast. You may
say that my comments aren't politically correct,
that I'm making an arse of
myself, that I'm making dreadful social boobs.
All I can say is, someone has to say this!
bad schoolboys, and even to a lesser extent naughty
schoolgirls, have no respect at all for
their society, brought up being allowed to do
what they want without fear of punishment. "Screw
this world!" they say. "Sod
etiquette! Fuck authority! Blow
jobs!", full of self-importance
like the feathered cock that
struts about the farmyard. They need to know how
hard it can be in this world. I should know that
they don't just hand jobs out to
anyone. I propose we hammer this knowledge into
them smartly by reintroducing what was recently
my friends, I say we must BRING BACK SPANKING!
people are forever complaining about how the
world was much more civilised when they were
young. Why is this? Because in their day they
were rigorously spanked for
their indiscretions! Politically incorrect it may
be. Corporal punishment it may be. But when I
look at what the kids of today have become I say
it is well worth it. They must all be spanked,
even troublesome teenagers, just to show how
easily we can strip their
dignity from them.
this point I must apologise to the people using
search engines to find porn who I have
shamelessly lured to this essay. I know how
frustrating using a search engine can be, but I
think you'll agree my cause is worth underhand
tactics. If you're not interested in my words,
then fine. Just read out all the words in bold
type in a lusty staccato manner while vigorously
masturbating and that should be enough for you.
if you agree with my sentiments, please feel free
to make use of the following graphic. Together,
my friends, we can give these naughty
youths exactly what they deserve!
updates - features - essays - reviews - comics - games - novels - about - contact - forum - links